My Take On Football: How It's Like A Reality TV Show
Let's get ready to RUUUUUMBLE because football season is here. Hip-hip-effing-hooray.
Yes, 'tis the season for touchdowns and passes, uniforms and cheering, beer and wings...and husbands and boyfriends going MIA on Sundays. And Mondays. And Thursdays.
Last February, I could hardly conceal my excitement about the countdown to Superbowl. With 17 weeks (16 games) until Super Bowl XLVII (WTF does that even stand for?), I am already starting the countdown until this is over. Honestly, I wish I could be excited for football... I wish I could get into it... I wish, OH, how I wish I could understand the point of a cable channel dedicated to making my brain explode by showing 8 games at once... But, alas, I'm wired differently.
I hoped that watching a show like "Hard Knocks" on HBO would sort of rev me up about the two words that I've mentioned before haunt me in my sleep: "THE GAME."
The game. The game is on. Going to watch the game with the guys. Want to come over for the game? Sorry, I can't. The Game! The guys are coming over for the game. I'll call you after the game. Great game. Goooooood game. HORRIBLE game. Boring game. The game. THE. GAME. The Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaame.
WELL, I've decided that there is only way for me to understand and accept the likely fact that Eli and Peyton/Payton (I don't care about the stupid spelling) are going to generate more high fives on a Sunday than me walking around naked. I must look at THE GAME as a reality show a la "The Bachelorette".
It is a season basically filled with a bunch of eligible dudes and every week they get to date (aka PLAY) the bachelorette (the other team) and "win" (her heart). At the end, the last team/guys standing will go to the "Final Rose Ceremony" (aka SUPERBOWL). There, one team/guy will declare victory and my guess is (thanks to Tim Tebow) there will be a dude down on one knee. For the days and weeks to follow, there will be a ton of press and media discussing said winner until ulitmately, everyone forgets and loses interest... until the season starts again.
And there, my friends, you have it, the REALITY of football. Go team.