"Project Runway All Stars" Recap: Seriously? A Puppet?

After last week's stellar episode I am a little—no—a lot, let down by this week’s show. This challenge is so confusing. Is it costume design? It is my impression that costume design has always been frowned upon on Project Runway. And correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t Miss Piggy a puppet. Why does everyone with a straight face—keep referring to her as though she were human.

While I’m still reeling from the theme of the challenge, Mila comes on and tells us that based on the high-end designers that have designed for Miss Piggy in the past, she thinks she would like to give her a mod sixties look. Really Mila? May I suggest a black and white color blocked shift? Kenley tells us Miss Piggy reminds her of herself. Great. Lastly, Michael Costello has a seven year old that loves the “Muppet babies” so he loves the “Muppet babies.”

As if things aren’t strange enough, at Mood Gordana tells us that pink is a happy color but she doesn’t look happy. She actually looks barely awake, which is perhaps why she starts making a nightgown. Austin is working with a bow concept.

We learn a lot about Miss Piggy. Miss Piggy is stylish and sexy. Miss piggy is a lady. Miss Piggy is a fashion icon.  No People. Miss Piggy is a puppet. I feel like I’m in crazy town. I have to give credit to Anthony who seems to be the only designer laying off the Kool-aid and making jokes about bacon.

Joana Coles enters the workroom and tells us that this is the best challenge in the history of Project Runway. (Personally I’m putting it down at the bottom with last season’s creepy stilt challenge.) Her discussions with the designers are disturbing. Gordana tells Joana that she is making a dress that makes the puppet appear “younger” and “comfortable.” Joana warns her that celebrities want to look good, not be comfortable. Next, Joana discusses, with a straight face, whether or not a pig wearing a giraffe print presents some kind of a moral dilemma and whether or not a headband will work with her ears. Her parting comment is a warning not to “disappoint Miss Piggy.” Is this the new “don’t bore Nina?”

Austin tells us he understands Miss Piggy because he also refers to himself as “moi.” This is actually the only thing in the entire episode that makes sense to me. I have no problem believing that Austin, dressed like a 1940’s director in breeches/picador with a pencil thin mustache calls himself “moi.”

The judges are crazy too. Georgina is worried that miss piggy may fall out of Kenley’s dress. That would qualify as a puppet wardrobe malfunction. Gordana is sent home because her sad pink nightgown wont flatter Miss Piggy’s curves. Rami is in the top with a tacky polka dot cha-cha dance costume. Michael Costello wins with a lame strapless dress made of plastic looking fabric with some strange loop appendage and matching headpiece that wont interfere with pig ears.

And then, to end it all, Michael Costello makes a pass at the puppet. Seriously.

**Why would you want to miss this kind of workroom drama? Tune in to "Project Runway All Stars" Thursdays at 9/8c on Lifetime. And catch up on full episodes for free online now!