When It Comes To Divorce. Do Children Ever Get Over It?
There are so many times when I've think I've got this single mom thing down pat.
I left my amazing job to create a successful self-employed life that allows me to be home with my two beautiful children. To be present. To show up for PTA meetings, school trips, drop offs and pick ups, concerts, in-class readings, bake sales, family dinners every night, evening walks and bike rides and bedtime stories.
But I also know that since our divorce their father is 3,000 miles away in London, and there will always be a void I cannot fill. I know this.
But every now and then I worry that the void that I actually think I do a good job filling is not even being filled either. For example, recently we had a dinner time conversation about our wishes.
Of all the things for my children to wish for as summer vacation looms large, I was totally surprised to hear that they were wishing for me and their father to get back together.
It's been nearly five years since we separated. And he has a new baby and girlfriend.
I try to keep my children rooted in reality and make it clear to them that their Dad and I are much happier and are better parents when we live separately.
But it seems that they are still holding out hope.
Is this normal? How long is too long for a child to hold on to a fantasy that will never happen. And I do mean never.
And how do I deal with feeling like even though I work so hard day and night (literally!) to create a great life for them, that they are still wanting and wishing for something else? Longing still for their old life?
That kind of hurts.
Any divorced moms out there with some advice for me?