Being a Supermom: Myth, Legend or Debilitating Syndrome?
By Mollee Bauer, General Manager, Pregnancy.org
What’s that, up in the sky…it’s a bird…it’s a plane…it’s supermom? Is the myth of the supermom a positive ideal to strive for, or a syndrome that makes new moms feel like they’re doomed to fail?
Think about your other mom friends. We all have one that seems to get everything done seamlessly, loves being a mom, still does all the activities she loved before having her children and, to top it off, is doing well in her career or has chosen to stay home full-time and be the perfect SAHM. But, can she actually leap tall buildings in a single bound?
With social media pushing everyone’s accomplishments in our faces, it’s hard not to feel competitive or discouraged at times. That’s when you just have to say, “no” and walk away. You could actually go for a walk or get food at the grocery store. What a novel idea!
When you become a mom, or dad for that matter, you feel like once you’ve been handed your baby, that you can’t possibly complain or gripe about being a parent. There is never going to be perfection. There is never going to be zero conflict or absolutely stable emotions. As a group, to believe in the supermom is to do the rest of us injustice. We’re not in a contest, we should instead, care about one another.
Set realistic goals. Do what works for you and your family and not because your friend does it and it works for her. You don’t need to hear that someone else’s kid just ran a marathon at three, or that they can read a novel (okay not realistic but you get the idea). It would be more beneficial to hear, “Wow I totally know what you mean about tantrums. They are really hard…sometimes I just want to cry and pull my hair out.” The response would certainly be more supportive.
Supermom doesn’t exist. We do. We’re real. You will eventually attain balance. You will eventually get everything done. Even the messes will get taken care of in time. You don’t need a cape to prove you’re a great mom, although the ability to fly sure wouldn’t hurt.