Are You a Micromanaging Mom?
Once upon a time, I used to be a fairly laid back person. I’m sure there are people in my life who would disagree because I also happen to be an overachiever, which masked the cool, relaxed undertones in my personality. The fact remains that at one point in my life you would be just as likely to find me barefoot reading a book under a tree as you would be likely to find me sitting at my desk studying. Something about becoming a mom made it more difficult to wander happily through my day, and becoming a work at home mom was the final nail in the coffin.
I am now not only a planner. I am a habitual micromanager.
The first sign that I had succumb to this common parenting illness was when I planned my family’s first trip to Walt Disney World. Not only did I purchase and actually read several vacation guides, but at times I found myself taking notes on a legal pad. That legal pad joined us on our trip as I led my extended family of six through the parks following the exact ride order I had carefully crafted to maximize our time. Once I began working nearly full time hours, my husband began to pitch in more often with household tasks. Rather than thank him for doing the laundry, I pointed out that khaki is not white and quietly picked through the baskets to check his sorting techniques without him knowing it. And the kids' lunches? He makes them every night, but I rearrange and add other items in the morning before sending them off to school.
The problem with becoming Micromanaging Mom is that she tends to drive away Cool Mom, Relaxed Mom, and Mom-Who-Has-Free-Time, who really are all very nice and happy people. I decided this week to take the bull by the horns and release it out to pasture, let someone else have a turn at keeping track of every minute details of my family’s lives. When my husband began to talk to me about television brands and deals for our upcoming HD television purchase, I stopped him saying, “Honey, I trust you. You’ve got this. I do not have time to micromanage every little decision we make. You decide.”
It felt liberating, and I began to see the merit in letting others help out with everything from making decisions to taking care of the house and the family. What could you be doing with your free time if you found a way to just let go once in a while?
Have you become a micromanaging mom?