I'm Sick... And My Dog's Wearing Moisturizer
I'm sick. I've got a virus. My head hurts, my body hurts, my hair hurts. All I want to do is pull the covers over my head and sleep until my fever is gone. But I can't, because I'm a parent. Parents have the worst benefits of any profession. No holidays, no personal days and no sick days. Who negotiated this contract? I had better benefits as a 16 year-old grocery store cashier.
I just need some peace and quiet with no one asking me for anything. Which is why today I've said yes to the following:
1. "Can we tear out pages from this magazine you haven't read yet?" YES
2. "Can we watch four more hours of TV?" YES
3. "Can we have potato chips, cheese and apples for dinner?" YES
4. "Can we go through your purse?" YES
5. "Can we put this [$45 under-eye] cream on the dog?" YES
As I watch them rub revitalizing eye serum into the dog's fur, I think - $45 seems like a fair price for 5 minutes of peace. Maybe the dog will stay still and stretch it to 10 minutes.