Giving a Gift to My Son on His Sister’s Birthday – a Total Sucker Move?
My daughter’s birthday party is this weekend which means she’ll be receiving a sh*tload of presents from her friends. It is also a guarantee that that my son will have a huge fake grin on his face while she opens said gifts and he’ll find an excuse to cry about something else because deep inside he’s going to be jealous and he’s going to feel left out. Which brings me to my total sucker ways.
I’m going to buy him a present. And while I’m pretty confident that it’s a pretty bad move and what I SHOULD be doing is teaching him that it can’t always be about him, I will still feel bad for him. I can’t help it.
I went to some “mommy boards” - because that’s ALWAYS a great idea when you are questioning a decision you are about to make – a bunch of self-righteous parents with opinions about everything will absolutely make you feel great about yourself.
Two things happened:
1) I felt like child services was going to take my kids away because giving a sibling a present when it isn’t his or her birthday makes you a terrible parent. It’s borderline abuse.
2) I somehow ended up reading about moms who don’t let their kids eat ANYTHING with processed sugar…or meat….or honey….or gluten. All while I was making instant macaroni and cheese and slice and bake cookies. So I felt bad about myself which resulted in me eating all of the above.
Here are some of the comments I read about the whole present to sibling thing:
- “No, that’s stupid.”
- “Birthdays are a ridiculous holiday to celebrate in the first place. What makes someone so special that a day of the year is dedicated to giving them gifts? You don't choose your birth day. I refuse to celebrate my birthday based on just that principal. Celebrate milestones that someone works for, like graduation, not some random day thrust upon you.”
- “Um NO! There is absolutely no reason to do that unless your children are so spoiled they think they entitled to presents, birthday or not. It also basically defeats the purpose of a birthday. Having a day to make your child feel special because it is THEIR day. Oh no sorry kid. You aren’t that special, because your siblings get presents too. It’s just another day.”
- "I've heard of this. Sounds stupid. It's not your birthday - deal with it. I never got gifts on my siblings' birthdays and I'm fine, and so are they. They need to learn when it's their turn and when it's not."
So that settles that. I’m buying him two presents. What would you do?